I forgot ,I totally forgot! Relationships are a special kind of struggle. After being single for so long,I have to admit that I'm struggling with this. I know last time i said I wasn't going to blog about "the man" yet, I'm still not gonna talk about him on here,just going to talk about how I feel.
*sighs* what can I say... Relationships are a special kind of struggle. Oh wow! I didn't realise,I know relationships require work but it's different when you're actually doing the work! I feel like we are like chalk and cheese. I'm Virgo,he's Pisces- earth+water=Mud! When did i start believing in horoscope? Well I don't! I'm just trying to show how different we are.
I like to talk hours on end to my current POI (Person of interest),he can't do 7mins of just rambling and not talking about anything but random rubbish,the kind I like. I know when to create time for us and say no to friends,he doesn't! Having to plan time to spend together is difficult,cuz of the nature of our jobs. I tell my friends that I don't know when I became so needy and clingy,but I know it's not just me. I'm not going crazy! It's always something,one thing after the another. One thing I've learnt is Patience! Woah! I have learnt to be patient! If you know me well,you'll know this is huge! I even find myself doing the things he likes,even down to my nail polish *covers face*
I can't help wondering "what on earth did I get myself into?" like omg! I have learnt to put my non issues on the back burner,just so I'm there. Who'll be there for me? When I want to talk,everyone else is available but the one I want. Sometimes I'm not very positive as to where this can lead,but I promise to give it a chance. These days it feels like that's what fills 70% of my thoughts and talks sef. I don't want to talk to my friends about how I feel anymore, cuz I feel it's becoming a bit too much,things should not be this much,no?!
I'm not even sure what this post is trying to say,I think it's all summed up in the first
paragraph really,but I still had to ramble na :D
I can't proof read,if I do,I won't post this any longer.
Till next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and yours
xoxo
Ms.Bollz
Showing posts with label Relationship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationship. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Friday, March 18, 2011
Love don't live here anymore.
Hey guys! Howdy do? yea we're still on this "howdy" tip,lol. So I just left the lovely TWP's blog aka VivrantThing and the topic struck a cord,well 'cuz 1. I'm woman 2. I've been a victim 3. I know a number of victims 4. I also know a few offenders too.
Basically the post is about "String-long relationships",the ones that date for while (years in most cases),promise each other the world,claim to love each other,the lady may even get a "rock" and a fancy proposal and then just like that gbam!Get dumped. Next thing you know homeboy is engaged to be married to the "love of his life",SHIKENA!
Ok after that background let me give you a brief history into my dating/love life. In my very first proper relationship,I was the offender.I knew I didn't love him,yet I strung him along for a few months and one day out of the blue i broke it off with him. He cried,he begged but as much as I knew he loved me,I knew I couldn't reciprocate,so it was better to let things end then rather than years down the line. Relationship 2 happened about 2 and a half,almost 3 years after the first...fast forward 9-10months it was over (I believe I've blogged about this before). He didn't string me along,we both knew it wasn't going nowhere,he met up with someone else (from his past),I bounced,he married her in about 3months. Relationship number 3 hahaha this one was a dumb move from day one,after on and off for about 2years,I let him go. I've been single for over a year now.
A couple of weeks ago this guy I used to talk to said B,"I don't like this new you. You're so cold and detached...I miss the old you." See at this point I didn't realize I had changed,in fact I still don't think I've changed. I think this is another side to me he couldn't see before until he tried to string me along for no damn reason. We are friends now,no worries but I can't forget how he tried to play me.
I remember sometime ago, I met this guy, not bad on eyes, tall, has a good job, ambitious...you know my kind of guy. We met up a few times yada,yada,yada until I asked him what he wanted from me, dude bolted! lmao! Calls ceased,bbm's reduced,I stopped seeing him. LOL I guess he couldn't take my straight forward question. He assumed (for some foolish reason) I wanted him to wife me or something. I mean dude we've hyped you,you're hot but you're not on fire,no need to pour gasoline on yourself (I hate the smell). You see my question was simply to know where to put him- "Just friends", "Potential boyfriend", "Bootycall" or "Not interested" (which is where he is now). I was simply trying to avoid a "String-along relationship".
As they say a man can date you for 10years and know from the 10th minute when he met you that he wasn't going to marry you. Woe betide any man that will date me for years, meet my parents and loved ones, even put ring on my finger and then not wife me.
Even my girlfriend has accused me of being emotionally detached and I agree.
I am not emotionally attached to people,I am the kind of person that stays home days on end without any physical interaction with friends. I am not the kind of girl that throws "darl,hun,sweetie,love..." (and whatever other kind of endearment people use these days) around. It doesn't come naturally to me. Don't get me wrong,I do love my friends but unless we are in a relationship and I actually love you,you WILL NOT be hearing "love you baby" from me. I don't fall easily,actually I have only ever been "in love" once.(Disaster). I lose interest in men as fast as I gained interest. I am inpatient in waiting for you to know what you want ('cuz i pretty much know where i wanna put u in 5mins of meeting) and once it's gone,it is gone *shrug*. I'm not a "long ting" type of babe. I told some guy that and he didn't get it either :o
Love don't live here anymore,it's been long gone. I do hope to meet up with love again someday soon,but until then My name is Bollz and I am emotionally unavailable.
People, avoid String-along relationships, I prefer straight up relationships,be honest and say what you want or don't want. Ladies (especially) remember IF YOU ARE NOT MARRIED,YOU ARE SINGLE. Don't get it twisted.
Till next time Peace, Love, Harmony and Respect.
xoxo,
Ms.Bollz
P.S Ms licious i'm changing my font colour for you (this one nko?),don't say i never did anything for you :p
Basically the post is about "String-long relationships",the ones that date for while (years in most cases),promise each other the world,claim to love each other,the lady may even get a "rock" and a fancy proposal and then just like that gbam!Get dumped. Next thing you know homeboy is engaged to be married to the "love of his life",SHIKENA!
Ok after that background let me give you a brief history into my dating/love life. In my very first proper relationship,I was the offender.I knew I didn't love him,yet I strung him along for a few months and one day out of the blue i broke it off with him. He cried,he begged but as much as I knew he loved me,I knew I couldn't reciprocate,so it was better to let things end then rather than years down the line. Relationship 2 happened about 2 and a half,almost 3 years after the first...fast forward 9-10months it was over (I believe I've blogged about this before). He didn't string me along,we both knew it wasn't going nowhere,he met up with someone else (from his past),I bounced,he married her in about 3months. Relationship number 3 hahaha this one was a dumb move from day one,after on and off for about 2years,I let him go. I've been single for over a year now.
A couple of weeks ago this guy I used to talk to said B,"I don't like this new you. You're so cold and detached...I miss the old you." See at this point I didn't realize I had changed,in fact I still don't think I've changed. I think this is another side to me he couldn't see before until he tried to string me along for no damn reason. We are friends now,no worries but I can't forget how he tried to play me.
I remember sometime ago, I met this guy, not bad on eyes, tall, has a good job, ambitious...you know my kind of guy. We met up a few times yada,yada,yada until I asked him what he wanted from me, dude bolted! lmao! Calls ceased,bbm's reduced,I stopped seeing him. LOL I guess he couldn't take my straight forward question. He assumed (for some foolish reason) I wanted him to wife me or something. I mean dude we've hyped you,you're hot but you're not on fire,no need to pour gasoline on yourself (I hate the smell). You see my question was simply to know where to put him- "Just friends", "Potential boyfriend", "Bootycall" or "Not interested" (which is where he is now). I was simply trying to avoid a "String-along relationship".
As they say a man can date you for 10years and know from the 10th minute when he met you that he wasn't going to marry you. Woe betide any man that will date me for years, meet my parents and loved ones, even put ring on my finger and then not wife me.
Even my girlfriend has accused me of being emotionally detached and I agree.
I am not emotionally attached to people,I am the kind of person that stays home days on end without any physical interaction with friends. I am not the kind of girl that throws "darl,hun,sweetie,love..." (and whatever other kind of endearment people use these days) around. It doesn't come naturally to me. Don't get me wrong,I do love my friends but unless we are in a relationship and I actually love you,you WILL NOT be hearing "love you baby" from me. I don't fall easily,actually I have only ever been "in love" once.(Disaster). I lose interest in men as fast as I gained interest. I am inpatient in waiting for you to know what you want ('cuz i pretty much know where i wanna put u in 5mins of meeting) and once it's gone,it is gone *shrug*. I'm not a "long ting" type of babe. I told some guy that and he didn't get it either :o
Love don't live here anymore,it's been long gone. I do hope to meet up with love again someday soon,but until then My name is Bollz and I am emotionally unavailable.
People, avoid String-along relationships, I prefer straight up relationships,be honest and say what you want or don't want. Ladies (especially) remember IF YOU ARE NOT MARRIED,YOU ARE SINGLE. Don't get it twisted.
Till next time Peace, Love, Harmony and Respect.
xoxo,
Ms.Bollz
P.S Ms licious i'm changing my font colour for you (this one nko?),don't say i never did anything for you :p
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Ladies (and Gentlemen)
So over the past week I've come here with the intention to blog, even started typing then changed my mind over and over again. I decided it (read as someone) wasn't worth an entry in my blog. So i shall move right along.
The other day a friend sent me this funny voice note "don't be a weste" (waste) cracked me up but made a lot of sense. So i shall get up and pursue that dream of mine,fully register for the professional class,officially learn how to drive and get that licence, get references and apply for MSc. 2011 I Boluwatife shall not be a "weste" . I shall not let inconsequential things distract me from my goal,laziness shall not thrive over me either. God will provide,He'll lead,guide and protect me.He will crown all my efforts in Jesus name!
So now that i have said that,let me just say this:
Ladies(men can apply this too),if he misses you,he will call. If he cares,he will ask. Do not make excuses for him.
Don't wonder why hes twitting,has u on his bb and still doesn't holla.
If he wants you,he'll come after you.Don't go chasing him.
It's simple He is just not that into you.
Remember that you,my dear are worth more than a man that can't see you or isn't paying attention.
Invest that time you spend analyzing and making excuses for him in yourself and everything will turn out right. I promise.
[Random rant]
On that note I sign out.
Till next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and your's
xoxo
Ms.Bollz
The other day a friend sent me this funny voice note "don't be a weste" (waste) cracked me up but made a lot of sense. So i shall get up and pursue that dream of mine,fully register for the professional class,officially learn how to drive and get that licence, get references and apply for MSc. 2011 I Boluwatife shall not be a "weste" . I shall not let inconsequential things distract me from my goal,laziness shall not thrive over me either. God will provide,He'll lead,guide and protect me.He will crown all my efforts in Jesus name!
So now that i have said that,let me just say this:
Ladies(men can apply this too),if he misses you,he will call. If he cares,he will ask. Do not make excuses for him.
Don't wonder why hes twitting,has u on his bb and still doesn't holla.
If he wants you,he'll come after you.Don't go chasing him.
It's simple He is just not that into you.
Remember that you,my dear are worth more than a man that can't see you or isn't paying attention.
Invest that time you spend analyzing and making excuses for him in yourself and everything will turn out right. I promise.
[Random rant]
On that note I sign out.
Till next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and your's
xoxo
Ms.Bollz
Friday, October 8, 2010
I pray, I hope...
Excerpts from my unprovoked rant on bbm with my girl Tori
Gosh! I feel so ill
I need a man. The one who'll get me drugs,pepper soup,feed me,clean my vomit,hold me when I'm cold, fan me when I'm hot and there's no light. He'll dab my head with a cold cloth when I'm running a fever and even my whole body with a cloth when I can't make it to the bathroom.
He knows how to take care of me,because he loves me.
I know the perfect man (he once did all this for me) but I can't bring myself to love him the way I know he deserves.
I'm scared, I swear to you.
O_o *blankstare*
Not sure where all that came from,but that's the truth. I feel like I'm coming down with something (again) and in my weak state I took a trip down memory lane. I have the best family and friends one can ask for, but there's that something...
I pray, I hope i find it...
Peace, Love, Harmony n Respect to you and your's
xoxo
Ms.Bollz
Gosh! I feel so ill
I need a man. The one who'll get me drugs,pepper soup,feed me,clean my vomit,hold me when I'm cold, fan me when I'm hot and there's no light. He'll dab my head with a cold cloth when I'm running a fever and even my whole body with a cloth when I can't make it to the bathroom.
He knows how to take care of me,because he loves me.
I know the perfect man (he once did all this for me) but I can't bring myself to love him the way I know he deserves.
I'm scared, I swear to you.
O_o *blankstare*
Not sure where all that came from,but that's the truth. I feel like I'm coming down with something (again) and in my weak state I took a trip down memory lane. I have the best family and friends one can ask for, but there's that something...
I pray, I hope i find it...
Peace, Love, Harmony n Respect to you and your's
xoxo
Ms.Bollz
Monday, May 17, 2010
Cuddle Monday
WOW!
I typed a whole post about the cold,relationships,heatbreak,God...and blah! It's all gone.
Anyways I'll blog strictly now about cuddle Monday.So it's not news that I'm single, so like most single ladies around Lagos we are feeling this singlehood this cold,wet monday. These are the kind of days i'll whine and say "it's not fair".
1st of January,2010 I swore I'd had enough after 2years n some of breaking up,making up and all other kinds of drama in between. I said to you that if could not love me right on the first day of the year with fresh wishes and promises,how would you love me on all the other days for the rest of the year?! I'd be damned,if i had to go through all that this year.
I just read some blog and she said something about how she never talks to God about her relationships because she feels He has better things on His mind.I used to be like that until i realized i couldn't do it on my own anymore and i needed Him to come and take the pain away. Now i cast all my fears and worries unto Him and allow Him handle it,'cuz I've tried to do it on my own and I've failed. 2 heartbreaking relationships,back to back in 3years. Tough times don't last,but tough people do.
Moving on,maybe i should have put some vodka or litchao in my thermal,that woulda kept me warm at work.Girls are not smiling mehn.
So yesterday was my first day at d gym,thanks to Bims.It wasn't so bad,i survived d beginners level n I actually like Wale,pretty up straight trainer.I'll be going back on friday...excitement *silent scream*
Maybe one day I'll rock a bikini :D ok maybe not sha,but my September I must be selsy...then I shall beach bum for my birthday with a male figure :D
I had a much more interesting post earlier before blogger ate it.I kent shout
Anyways will the next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and yours
xx
I typed a whole post about the cold,relationships,heatbreak,God...and blah! It's all gone.
Anyways I'll blog strictly now about cuddle Monday.So it's not news that I'm single, so like most single ladies around Lagos we are feeling this singlehood this cold,wet monday. These are the kind of days i'll whine and say "it's not fair".
1st of January,2010 I swore I'd had enough after 2years n some of breaking up,making up and all other kinds of drama in between. I said to you that if could not love me right on the first day of the year with fresh wishes and promises,how would you love me on all the other days for the rest of the year?! I'd be damned,if i had to go through all that this year.
I just read some blog and she said something about how she never talks to God about her relationships because she feels He has better things on His mind.I used to be like that until i realized i couldn't do it on my own anymore and i needed Him to come and take the pain away. Now i cast all my fears and worries unto Him and allow Him handle it,'cuz I've tried to do it on my own and I've failed. 2 heartbreaking relationships,back to back in 3years. Tough times don't last,but tough people do.
Moving on,maybe i should have put some vodka or litchao in my thermal,that woulda kept me warm at work.Girls are not smiling mehn.
So yesterday was my first day at d gym,thanks to Bims.It wasn't so bad,i survived d beginners level n I actually like Wale,pretty up straight trainer.I'll be going back on friday...excitement *silent scream*
Maybe one day I'll rock a bikini :D ok maybe not sha,but my September I must be selsy...then I shall beach bum for my birthday with a male figure :D
I had a much more interesting post earlier before blogger ate it.I kent shout
Anyways will the next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and yours
xx
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