Behold, I will do a new thing...

Helloooooooooooo!

It's been forever since I blogged, I have tried once or twice since then but words...words... they just seem so hard to string together.

So what has happened since the last time? Well, I got a job. Yay right? Right. It's a job sha, does it pay my bills? Am I now financially independent? Am I happy at my job? The answer to all is NO! but it's a job right? Right!

The year has come to an end and I thank God for His grace. Grace is defined as "God's unmerited favour" and I hold on to that. He has been merciful even when I didn't deserve it. 2011 was not the best year, but I'm hopeful for 2012. I pray that 2012 will be good to me. I pray that I will be good to 2012 and hold on tight to my God, keep my side of things.

I drifted off to sleep tonight and woke to a broadcast from a friend/roommate at uni it was an early new year message and it had a scripture. Isaiah 43: 19

"Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert." 

NIV version says "For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it?"

I read it and it touched me in my Spirit, I decided to read the passage from the beginning. Tears began to pour from my eyes... I have gone so far from my God. I've been so distant from Him, I've not been able to partake of the promises He had for me in 2011. Then I got to verse 22

" 22 But thou hast not called upon me, O Jacob; but thou hast been weary of me, O Israel.  23Thou hast not brought me the small cattle of thy burnt offerings; neither hast thou honoured me with thy sacrifices. I have not caused thee to serve with an offering, nor wearied thee with incense."

Things got real. I haven't called upon Him, yes I say by God's grace but I haven't really called upon Him. I haven't offered him sacrifices. I owe God, so how do I expect all those promises? *sigh*

I don't mean to preach, it's not something I didn't know before but it's a time for sober reflection. I thank God for His grace, ask for forgiveness and pray for the grace to be better from now hence forth.

OKAY! I'll stop here. I wish you all (those that come here from time to time and those that just stumbled upon this page) a FANTASTIC New Year!!! May the best of the past years, be the worst of the latter years, may He cause His light to shine upon you, may He lift you up among kings, may the grounds always rise up to meet you, may you find favour wherever you go... AMEN!!!

Till next time, Peace, Love, Harmony and Respect to you and your's. See you in the New Year.

xoxo,

Ms. Bollz

In my little cocoon

Friend A: Hey wanna go out on friday?
Friend B: Errrr,well I'm hanging out with my other friend. What do you wanna do?
Friend A: Oh! it's nothing,just wanted to go to XYZ
Friend B: Oh ok,might be going to XYZ also,i'll let you know
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Friend A sends a message to another friend
*Friend no longer has you as a contact. Re-invite or delete contact*
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Two separate (unrelated) scenarios. They're a few things I take personal...actually I lie. They are quite a number of things, but it's no big deal, nothing to worry about, just amazes me really how easy I am forget. Over the years I have learnt not to expect much or bother about things/people much. Right now I am distant from people/friends, I wasn't aware of it until now. Maybe it was on purpose or maybe not, I dunno but for now I retreat back to my shell, only to come out when necessary.

Side note- The freedom I have on here... I doubt that many people (especially those that know me personally) read. Hehehehe
Oh! and before I go, let me share a little testimony with you. I've been a little down lately as my posts show but the other day I updated my BBM status to "Find your place of praise" (another story behind that phrase) ...and just when I was slipping into mild depression about the state of my affairs, I got a call to come for an interview. It went well, now waiting on the next stage.
Moral of the story: In ALL things, find your place of praise (in Him). He will always come through for you, always!

Till next time Peace, Love, Harmony and Respect to you and yours
xoxo
Ms. Bollz

P.U.S.H

So right about now on my BBM my status reads "I'm desperate!". That's exactly how I feel right now, desperate for something to happen. My life is just there, thats the problem nothing is happening. Don't be mistaken, it's not like I have it rough or that I have nothing to be thankful for, I do, I have a lot to be thankful for, but I want more, I need more. I just feel like I'm not going anywhere or doing anything, some days I just feel helpless. Am I not praying hard enough? Don't I want it badly enough? Am I not deserving yet?...
I am desperate for many things, if you know me and if you've been reading you'll know what they are. I don't know what my breaking point is, but I'm pretty sure I'm close.

It's raining cats and dogs outside (I wonder how "cats and dogs" came about or who did even)... Showers of blessing, maybe I should go and dance in the rain and catch the blessing head on (or rather,catch a cold) 'cuz I'm  desperate but instead I will P.U.S.H- Pray until something happens. Because something has to happen and soon!

Till next time Peace, Love, Harmony and Respect to you and yours
xoxo
Ms. Bollz

Ladies (and Gentlemen)

So over the past week I've come here with the intention to blog, even started typing then changed my mind over and over again. I decided it (read as someone) wasn't worth an entry in my blog. So i shall move right along.

The other day a friend sent me this funny voice note "don't be a weste" (waste) cracked me up but made a lot of sense. So i shall get up and pursue that dream of mine,fully register for the professional class,officially learn how to drive and get that licence, get references and apply for MSc. 2011 I Boluwatife shall not be a "weste" . I shall not let inconsequential things distract me from my goal,laziness shall not thrive over me either. God will provide,He'll lead,guide and protect me.He will crown all my efforts in Jesus name!

So now that i have said that,let me just say this:
Ladies(men can apply this too),if he misses you,he will call. If he cares,he will ask. Do not make excuses for him.
Don't wonder why hes twitting,has u on his bb and still doesn't holla.
If he wants you,he'll come after you.Don't go chasing him.
It's simple He is just not that into you.
Remember that you,my dear are worth more than a man that can't see you or isn't paying attention.
Invest that time you spend analyzing and making excuses for him in yourself and everything will turn out right. I promise.
[Random rant]

On that note I sign out.
Till next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and your's
xoxo
Ms.Bollz

Cuddle Monday

WOW!
I typed a whole post about the cold,relationships,heatbreak,God...and blah! It's all gone.
Anyways I'll blog strictly now about cuddle Monday.So it's not news that I'm single, so like most single ladies around Lagos we are feeling this singlehood this cold,wet monday. These are the kind of days i'll whine and say "it's not fair".
1st of January,2010 I swore I'd had enough after 2years n some of breaking up,making up and all other kinds of drama in between. I said to you that if could not love me right on the first day of the year with fresh wishes and promises,how would you love me on all the other days for the rest of the year?! I'd be damned,if i had to go through all that this year.
I just read some blog and she said something about how she never talks to God about her relationships because she feels He has better things on His mind.I used to be like that until i realized i couldn't do it on my own anymore and i needed Him to come and take the pain away. Now i cast all my fears and worries unto Him and allow Him handle it,'cuz I've tried to do it on my own and I've failed. 2 heartbreaking relationships,back to back in 3years. Tough times don't last,but tough people do.
Moving on,maybe i should have put some vodka or litchao in my thermal,that woulda kept me warm at work.Girls are not smiling mehn.
So yesterday was my first day at d gym,thanks to Bims.It wasn't so bad,i survived d beginners level n I actually like Wale,pretty up straight trainer.I'll be going back on friday...excitement *silent scream*
Maybe one day I'll rock a bikini :D ok maybe not sha,but my September I must be selsy...then I shall beach bum for my birthday with a male figure :D

I had a much more interesting post earlier before blogger ate it.I kent shout
Anyways will the next time Peace,Love,Harmony and Respect to you and yours
xx